A lot of our Grrrl Army members probably won’t catch much of this story if you’re outside of Australia, but I’m going to write about it anyway.  In fact, I was going to write a blog about rape culture a week ago, and dropped it on draft because I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to write it at the time.

2017 has been one helluva year.  We all thought it was going to be dookie with POTUS Dick Splash stepping into the role for the next 4 years.  I don’t like to talk poltics because it divides us.  But lets face it- anyone who pushes anti-abortion rights and jurisdiction over a women’s body, is not revered in my book.  Yes President Dick Splash has actually done some decent things, and if you’re a bit of a conspiracy theorist like I am, you’d find that all President’s, no matter what side- are merely puppets.  But that is neither here nor there.

2017 has turned out to be ‘not too shabby’.  Sure, it was the MOST stressful year of my life, to BOOT- between finances with the business, launching our first live event, getting diagnosed with Graves’ disease, living in a brand new foreign country, for the third time in less than 3 years… it’s been intense.  But all and all, with what’s transpired with the #MeToo campaign, I can say that this has turned out to be a launching pad for what is about to be OUR FKN YEAR Y’ALL!

We are NOT putting up with anymore shit!

Or are we?

So let’s get to Jarred Hayne.  Jarred is a star Rugby player down in Australia, who was drafted to come play in the USA for the San Francisco 49ers.  According to the last article I read, it sounds like Jarred was a ‘good ol’ Mormon boy’ up until he signed on with the niners.  To which point he started partying and ‘acting a fool’, if you will.

Within the last 24 hours, Jarred has been accused of rape.  Read the excerpt from an article below:

On the Sunday afternoon, the woman, identified only as “Ms V”, attended the 49ers game at Levi’s Stadium.
After the game, she and friends went to a restaurant for a meal and drinks, and then went to a bar.
Santa Clara County Court documents say that one of Hayne’s friends was texting and messaging the woman to find out which bar she was drinking at with her friends.

Hayne and his mates then joined the group and, as the documents say, her friends “had never seen [the young woman] so intoxicated”.
What happened next is what will be contested in the civil suit.
Ms V says in her court documents that in the early hours of Monday, December 21, 2015 “despite having minimal interaction that night [Hayne] took the now heavily intoxicated [woman] back to his home in San Jose via Uber”.
It was in his apartment the alleged incident took place with the woman who says she had never had sexual intercourse previously.

The documents say she felt pain, and the following morning woke up among bloodied sheets.
She then took “an undergarment” because she allegedly felt people would not believe the incident had taken place, and for police to test.
Through his legal representatives, Hayne unequivocally and vehemently denies the allegations.
Five days later, Hayne was again promoted to the 49ers’ 53-man roster after guard Alex Boone suffered a knee injury.

Hayne announced his retirement from the NFL on May 15, 2016, and joined the Fiji sevens team in hopes of playing in the 2016 Summer Olympics in Rio de Janeiro.
In May 2016, the young woman reported the alleged assault to San Jose police.
The District Attorney’s office informed the young woman that “there was not enough evidence to prove the crime of rape beyond a reasonable doubt”.

The thing that makes absolutely zero sense to me, is the part that says “She then took “an undergarment” because she allegedly felt people would not believe the incident had taken place, and for police to test.”  Which would have been somewhere shortly after the incident on December 21, 2015.  But then the article jumps to some bullshit history about what Jarred’s next moves were, then “In May 2016, the young woman reported the alleged assault to San Jose police.”

OK…  Like what the hell happened between January and April?

And when was “Ms V” informed:  “The District Attorney’s office informed the young woman that “there was not enough evidence to prove the crime of rape beyond a reasonable doubt”.?

And as far as the news outlets in Australia?  The tone from officials in the Football leagues:

“Boys will be boys”, and “let justice serve it’s purpose” and “innocent until proven guilty”.. well in America, you’re guilty until proven innocent. So not sure what the fuck happened there.

This is just typical, bullshit club behaviour- basically.

Reminds me of a time many years ago when my Husband was the CEO of the Gold Coast Titans, the team Jarred was last playing for upon his return back from rapeville, USA.  For a brief stint of 4 weeks, I was the assistant strength training coach for the under 20’s until a reporter found some topless photos of me on the internet, and decided to write an “article” framing me as ‘ex porn star’.   The article of course went into the fact that I’d been raped when I was 17, and that I was a reformed drug addict and alcoholic.  But the article turned out to be a massive “scandal” and caused an immense amount of bullying and slander online.

However- the year prior when a New Zealand rugby player married a porn star, the entire country was congratulating him on his ‘success’.  

At the end of the day, Australia needs to take a page out of Hollywoods book and stop glorifying professional athletes as if they’re some sort of Greek mythical God who cannot be touched.

And for any of you grrrls who’ve been down the soul-destroying path of sexual harassment or rape in your past, hopefully this video helps:

https://www.facebook.com/KonfidenceByKortney/videos/1591649067534816/

2018 is our fkn year grrrls!  GET YOUR BATTLE CRY OUT AND READY-

XOMFCEOKO

Have a look below at my highest “liked” (engaging) post on IG to date from my personal account.  It seems like people in general are really ready to embrace the new dawn of strong, powerful females.

 

Because comic books 📚 Back before we launched @grrrl_clothing I was working on a concept. “Ms. Leggy”- Her superpower was making any man fall in love anytime they gazed upon Her anaconda legs. A hard, strong personality like The Rock but an animalistic one when it came time to get down to business. Of course she silenced with her legs. Her job was to infiltrate corrupt monopolies where women were mistreated, seduce the highest ranking officials then 💥 🍉💦💀. Not all is lost – @figlesiase and I will get back to the drawing board eventually. The world needs more media that sits ‘outside the box’ so we can create a new box. One where females aren’t the ones getting raped and assaulted. Movies, books, ads, music videos- all media plays heavily into societal beliefs and what we grow up thinking. Look out homeboy- Ms. Leggy’s coming for ya 🐍🦖 And of course we’ll holler @therealstanlee
Hard to believe but I specifically asked @charleslowthian not to airbrush or photoshop my body when shooting. He’s just that good. And yeaaaaaaaaaa “Leggy” needs heels. She may have the world’s deadliest Thighs but they short like Kevin Hart. Plus the stripper heels turn into daggers 🗡
#comics #fantasy #supershero #killer #concept #legslikekortney #marvel #figure4 #anaconda #comicbooks #comicbook #female #empowerment #womenempowerment

By: Prue Houston findingmyfit

Today I’m changing it up a bit and reviewing an active wear brand. But not just any active wear brand. No. This one is so far removed from your run of the mill shopping mall brand its ridiculous! This one spruiks girl power with so much zest it’s infectious. This brand bases its sizes around beautiful body shapes and names them after their stable of powerhouse athletes. Oh and you can forget about seeing photoshopped “fit” models wearing clothes from this brand…hells no. There is no mistaking it, this rebellious brand is taking names and taking no shit, oh and if you don’t like it…um they couldn’t care less…in fact they may even flip you the bird!

This brand is GRRRL Clothing and they are here to change the game!

So yeah I’m a fan. I mean it’s hard not to be, just check out their Instagram or better still follow their MFCEO (I’ll let you figure that one out), the formidable, hilarious and oh so impressive Kortney Olson. It won’t take long for you to jump on the GRRRL Army bandwagon, I promise.

But before you do, let’s talk clothes. And by clothes I mean the awesome tee and windbreaker the team at GRRRL sent me to road test.

Here’s the low down on the gear…first up the G Windbreaker (shown) is the perfect lightweight item to wear outside. Super soft and comfy, I would wear this to and from the gym on cooler days and definitely while out walking. I wasn’t sure if my size estimate was correct but I was happy to say the G Windbreaker fit perfectly. I’m an all over Kortney btw. Side note: GRRRL Clothing sizes are all based on the body measurements of the GRRRL Athletes. You simply apply your upper body and lower body measurements to the body shape athlete closest to you and you’re all set.

Next is the Right to Bare Arms fitted tee. OMG I’m a sucker for a badass tee so I LOVED this one on sight but when I held it up I thought it looked like it would be too small. Can you imagine how happy I was when I popped it on and it fit…perfectly. I had big plans for this tee, so it was important that it felt comfy and looked flattering.

This blog might be the shortest read with the tallest reward you’ve had to boot- As a female entrepreneur, I will always endeavour to bring you tools that have changed my life for the better, and helped me find strength and power in relationships. Not power over someone else, but power over my own reactions and how I conduct myself. Society says that females are “weak and too soft for business”, but I call bullshit. We simply need to teach each other simple tools like the following. Enjoy!  And YES!  Share it!
MFCEO KO

Business Leadership: How to give someone bad news.

Do you have a parent that you need to break up with? Or a Boyfriend you need to kick to the curb? I mean, let down gently… Or how about an employee that needs to step up their game, but you’re not sure how to let them know in a constructive manner?

Grrrls- I present to you, the sandwich method.

The sandwich method was actually taught to me by one of my best life Teachers, my Husband. In fact, it was in the midst of him telling me that I needed to chill the fuck out, and stop stressing on everything because it was driving him nuts. Bless his heart-

Here’s how the conversation rolled:

(Positive)
“Honey- you are such a beautiful soul. You’re so caring and loving towards everyone and everything. I’m not sure you understand how much I admire you for that. I’ve never met someone with as much heart as you. It’s truly a gift.

(Negative)
However, sometimes our greatest gifts can cause us the most misery. You’re tendency to overthink and over stress details of things, and how others might perceive your intention, is having a bit of an effect on my own personal wellbeing. It’s bringing an extra layer of stress that I’m having a hard time coping with.

(Positive)
But I will say I’ll never meet another person on the face of this planet that I’d cope with as much extra shit for, than you. You’re my soulmate, and I would do anything for you. Not ‘damn near anything for you’, but anything for you. Because there is no one on this planet I admire, cherish and adore more than you.”

You see what he did there?

He started with a positive. He fed in the negative. Then he ended on a positive.

When you deliver information in this format, it allows the other person to take it onboard, and then end on a good note. As opposed to sitting someone down, and saying “Look Jane- you fucking suck. I appreciate you trying, but you’ve gotta do something different”… When you start out with a negative, the other party will shut down straight away. So start with a positive. Then slip in the part that needs addressing, fixing, or negative. Then end on a positive so they feel supported and encouraged to do something constructive, and not in a framework of feeling defensive.

I had a beautiful grrrlarmy member message me over IG and ask me how she could break up with a parent, as she remembered reading a blog months back on my personal brand’s website.

I suggested she could start with a letter first, or move into a convo.
I said something along the lines of:
“Start with the positive, put in the negative, end on the positive- so it sounds something like this: I love you because x, y, and z however I’m working on myself and need to surround myself with positive strong women. I feel disrespected with the way you’ve treated me lately. I will always love and appreciate everything you’ve sacrificed for me, and I hope you find happiness because you deserve it.”

Proof is in the love heart emoji. This shit works.

The reason why I wanted to write this, is this is the simple shit we aren’t taught in school. Come to think of it, effective communication is INCREDIBLY challenging, and yet the most rewarding tool to have in your tool belt. This is why I have insisted on doing a powerful, life-changing keynote on this topic at #GL18 April 28th in Las Vegas. The entire value of your ticket will be worth this one keynote alone, as I’m about to change your life and set you free. Buy your goddamn ticket here if you haven’t already! You deserve it!

Normally I applaud people for going against the grain and calling it how it is. But this, however- is NOT calling on anything but absolute shite. The Mommy Activist isn’t that foolish to produce something so outlandish- she knows people like myself are going to share and help her get exposure. But at this precise moment I’m too upset to not share my thoughts.

https://www.facebook.com/theactivistmommy/videos/1491494530968691/

She’s claiming that women who’ve participated in #MeToo, and have shared their story of being “a victim”, are in fact NOT a victim and that we (because I was in the MeToo camp before it was a ‘thing’ or a ‘trend’ as she calls it) should have known that our bosses didn’t want us up in their hotel room to discuss giving us a raise.

Let me break it down for you “Mommy”-

At 17 years old- and being clean off meth for 3 Days (despite being the ASB President at a Catholic High School, in a Christian rock band and bound for Stanford… although I knew to “Just say no” to drugs, like my Mommy told me- it didn’t work out that way), I was a lost messy soul. As recommended by my school counselor, I attended a boxing class to meet my new boxing coach to help mentor me and stay off meth.  After all, the root of my wanting to use was because I felt fat, so boxing was a good solution.  Or was it?

Despite the fact my mother taught me “all of the things she teaches her 6 daughters”, I still didn’t know where to draw the line, and at 17 years old let a 72 year old man lure me into his home because I was going to be his “last world champion before he retired”. (I Guess that’s me getting lured into his hotel room to talk about my raise)

Shortly after arriving, he drugged me and I woke up with him inside of me. For the next 10 years I sucked myself down into a world of pain and misery because I believed it to be my fault. I must of lead him on.

This woman claims that those of us in the MeToo camp are prostitutes and not victims.

The most prominent story that comes to my mind is Monica Lewinsky. Imagine being an intern, an impressionable, young woman with the President of the United States showing you attention and interest. Until you’re in that position, and get “sucked” in too close to the fire to be able to use your voice and say no- you couldn’t possibly understand.

The answer isn’t making more women feel like Absolute shit for not knowing the right tools– and in fact I can’t think of a more unhelpful piece of media in my 36 years on this planet.

I am proud of my past. I WAS a victim. But I am NOW a victor and use my experience as strength to help other young girls become grrrls and avoid situations like I’d gotten myself into.

Keep showing up and telling your story and be PROUD of wherever you are in your journey. And remember- “No one has the authority to make you feel inferior without your consent” -E Roosevelt