Sisters. 

As we’re rolling into GL18- I thought I’d share some thoughts with you. 

This screenshot of my personal accounts are all negative balances except my checking account with $184.07 in it. 

The $25,000 loan and my credit card just bridging $7,000 are all expenses from GL17. 

I’m not financially irresponsible, just uneducated.

My dad got me my first pretend checkbook when I was 14?  But when I started using drugs and drinking at 17, needless to say I wasn’t the most financially responsible person. I remember the first time I learned I owed my bank $1200 from the mysterious “reserve line” I wasn’t even aware I had.  Apparently when you deposit a check, only $100 of it is available for the first 24 hours until it clears.  #whoops. I also remember when I bought my first house, and after the first year, I looked at the actual statement, and noticed that I had basically paid zero off the principal of the loan, and that my mortgage of $2300 was going towards interest.  I was gutted.  I hate owing people money, I hate being late on payments, and I always do my best to keep my credit score in at least the Low 700’s.

Anyway, I digress…..

Financial insecurity has always been a ‘thing’ for me.  I grew up in a hard working middle class family.  I never went without anything, but I was always feelings like we never had enough.  Could potentially be alcoholism, but I don’t have the mental capacity to go into that right now.

This picture was yesterday, 12 hours at a desk working on the event, but I’m actually writing this blog from the back of a van, with bags of inventory piled around me in trash bags as myself and my two wing grrrls, drive towards Vegas for 2018.  I still have a lot to do leading up to this event which is only FIVE DAYS away from happening now.  But at least unlike last year (our first year), I wasn’t just diagnosed with Hyperthyroidism and sleep deprived for 2 weeks!

But as we roll into GL18, I look at the debts I took on from my personal account, to pull this event off.  We took out several loans, and have spent the majority of 2017 paying them off, but have yet to touch my personal debts.  The credit card was used for AV costs, and the cash flow manager loan was used to pay The Artisan hotel, to take over the hotel.

Clearly, we had to learn that lesson the hard way.  After GL17, there were SEVERAL times we nearly rolled up our doors due to the inability to get ahead.  But of course, we’ve always found a way, and looking back on our recent IGG campaign, YOU all found a way……

So now, with GL18 just days away, I noticed that I’m starting to get on edge, and had to question why.  Of course there is a lack of preparation.  We spent 10 days from April 8-18th packing up our warehouse and shipping out 700 orders.  Not great timing in retrospect to be doing that RIGHT before your second annual event.

But I realised that a big part of this edginess comes from that rooted fear of financial insecurity.

But the reality is, financial security is an illusion.  And this is why I’m writing this blog.  If you’re like me, you can easily look at numbers in your account, and let that dictate your mood, or feeling of success.  I can quickly look in my personal account and become overwhelmed and think “what the actual fuck are we doing?”.

Then I think back to the 8 year old who came and met me yesterday after talking to her on the phone a little over a month ago about why she should love her body, and not feel like she is anything less than perfect.  I think about the tears that rolled down her face as we finished saying The Pledge together, and I know that financial insecurity is an illusion.  I think back to the day prior to that, and look at the footage we captured of Amber Gallegos interpreting (signing) a video for us, and explaining the importance of bringing awareness to the deaf community and how we need to do better as a society.

I also think of every member of the grrrlarmy who has had her life changed by this brand.  And whilst my Grandmother might not see the value in what we’re doing because all she ever hears about is how tight money is, and my partner and I are fighting, and my health is declining.  But what a lot of people don’t understand, is that entrepreneurship is rewarding beyond not having to wake up to an alarm clock, being told what to do by someone else, and getting to set your own schedule.  It’s about having the opportunity for creating real, substantial change.

So if you’re reading this, and you’re a business owner, or contemplating starting your own business, do not let financial insecurity deter you from chasing your passion.  These numbers in my personal account are temporary.  And even if they kept getting bigger, who the fuck cares?  We’ve created an army of women ready to FIGHT for any one of us.  GL18 is doubled in size from GL17, and we learned by making A LOT of mistakes the first time around.  If we let that keep us back from doing it again, there wouldn’t be any magic.

When I die, I’m not taking any of these numbers with me, positive or negative.  Interest rates and the ‘Federal Reserve’, have a fascinating history if you ever get time, look up how the institution got started, and who’s behind it. “The Thrive Movement” is a good place to start on youtube.

Once again, I digress….

So much is about to go down next weekend.  I can’t even articulate.  But had I let fear creep in, and financial insecurity hold me back, a lot of lives wouldn’t be evolving next weekend.  Which of course will have a ripple effect on many more.

So to all of you who have made the sacrifices to get out here, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, and know that GL19 will be even more untouchable.  With that many more lives impacted.

Love

MFCEO

 

So check this out…

On my IG I have a WAZOO of messages in my DM request folder.  I used to go in there once a month and have a scout for grrrls reaching out, but now I attempt to do it once every other day.  Today I found this message from a guy that taught me a little lesson.  Hence why I’m here to share with you.

Let me just paint a picture for you.  I’m having a horrible day.  Yeah, poor me.  But legit- being an entrepreneur is incredibly difficult.  Every single day is a new height, on a brand new roller coaster, that’s never been ridden before.  One day you’re at the top of it, laughing so hard you’re nearly crying, then 6 hours later your stuck upside down actually crying because you’re scared and you want the fuck off.  So today, I’m not in a great frame of mind.  Taking that energy with me, I opened up the DM request folder.

99 out of 100 DM’s are from blokes.  Either sending a shitty emoji in response to my story, which of course has disappeared so I’ve no clue what it was in response to anyway- or, saying how they want to do x, y, or z to me.  I rarely open them and look, and I usually always never reply.  But then I saw this fella, and thought “huh- he doesn’t look like your average guy trying to holler at me… let’s see what it says.”

Then I read his message.  I got to the last sentence, and saw “I will tell you more about me on fb messenger or email”.  I immediately thought, “the FUCK you will!  Who the hell do you think you are Romeo?”…. then for shits and giggles I clicked on to check out his feed.  I looked at a couple of the newest post, and Immediatly thought “should I bloke this bloke?”… But then I kept scrolling.  I watched the above video, and started to wonder if they guy was a bit psycho.  Then, for whatever reason, it dawned on me.  It dawned on me what his actual message said before that last sentence I chose to become fixated on, when I started drawing up my judgements about him.

He said, “I am 48 years old and have a fourth grade level math skills, this is what makes me unique”.  Then it dawned on me- maybe this guy isn’t trying to hit on me, or holler at me- and he simply is just looking for a goddamn fucking Friend.  

You see, perspective is a really powerful tool.  We always have the choice to look at every situation in a different light.  ALWAYS.  Yes, it’s incredibly important to follow your instincts and be switched on when scrolling social media, and block people who might pose a risk of being obsessive- but all in all- remember that you might have some lonely people out there in the world just looking for a connection.

Do the next right thing and be a decent human being.

October, 2013. Gold Coast, Australia.

As most of you know, the story behind GRRRL and how we got started, is direct pull from the teenage girl wellness camp I founded called Kamp Konfidence.  After 2 years of running the weekend program and 61 graduates who’s lives will never be the same, one of my partners became pregnant and needed to tap out.  (Seems to be a common theme in my life lol!). So in the down time, we decided to take the Vision and Mission of Kamp Konfidence and roll it into a clothing line that would reach every corner of the world, much stronger and much faster.

Now- somewhere along the way, I went to the Fit Expo in Melbourne.  I’ll never forget that weekend, as I had horrific gastro for the first time in my life.  It took the life of me to walk around that convention center and taking pics with people, without shitting my pants.  To make it even more interesting, was I had to try and not get to freaked out about going on NATIONAL TELLEY the next day to talk to Sunrise about Kamp Konfidence.  Funny story, really.  But whilst I was at the Fit Expo, a Friend said I should meet Dana Linn Bailey and tell her about Kamp Konfidence, and that she was really nice and would probably help us by posting something on social media.  So we decided to make sneaky moves, and cut off all of her fans and intercept her coming out of some hidden room.

I knew of DLB because back when I was competing, she was more or less starting out.  People would often send me her pics and say ‘you guys are so similar!’.  At one point in 2008, I even emailed asking if they wanted to do a shirt collab with my back then brand, All Natural KO.  Rob wrote me back and politely said they were too busy.

Back at the expo, we walked up to her and said hi, and asked if she’d take ‘the pledge’ with me.  I explained what ‘the pledge’ was, and proceeded to tell her all about Kamp Konfidence.  I told her how it was a weekend wellness program for teenage girls that taught the 5 habits, principles, and lessons that lead to the development of self love, and that the aim was to show these girls that they/we are born and bred to see each other as competition.  DLB took ‘the pledge’, I put a Kamp Konfidence bracelet on her, we hugged, I asked her if she could give @kampkonfidence a shoutout on her social media, she said yes, we took some pics, and off we went in our separate directions.

A few months went by, and I never saw a post from DLB, but what I did see after someone sent me a post from her, was she launched “Confidence Camps’ at our gym.

I was pretty fucking huffy at the time.  So at that point, I decided I was going to compete in physique and come after her.  That didn’t last Long as a few months into comp prep, she announced her retirement.  Oh well!

November 18th, 2015. Gold Coast, Australia.

GRRRL Clothing was launched.  So no worries mate, I started my own shit with an evolved Mission and Vision.

Fastforward to today, and I see this get posted in our closed GRRRLs group:

 

 

At first, I felt myself get angry.  Because as most of you know, last year we announced our second annual live event, GL18.  Which of course includes Meg Gallagher in the line up.  I sat and thought, “so now you’re gonna jump on the bandwagon and start ‘bringing women together’, are ya?!  How fucking convenient!”

Then of course, I stopped and took a breath.  Because I’m constantly checking in with my thoughts and observing what my self talk is saying, I caught the thoughts, and dismantled them so I could put the anger to bed and remind myself of the truth.  The truth is this:

#NotYourCompetition

At the end of the day, the more women who are out there trying to lift up and unite more women, the better.  This mindset of seeing other Brand’s as competition is old, and reptilian thinking (unless of course someone changes their logo and it happens to look eerily closer to your Brand’s, then it’s time to slam the desk).  It’s a male, ego-based energy that needs to die in the ass.  As Eckart Tolle talks about in his book “A New Earth”, the new world is a place where people collaborate together to both get to the end result, working as a team.  Not coming from a place of scarcity, worry and fear.  There is so much hurt and pain (and fixing that needs doing in the world), that it couldn’t possibly all get touched by one movement alone.

Chances are, DLB had her ‘confidence camps’ planned a year before she’d ever met me, and that her ‘taking My idea’ was purely my ego thinking I’m something or someone special.  And again, chances are she had this planned with Meg a year ago.  It is imperative that we put our ego to bed when we’re women in business.  We’ve got to stand behind ‘Not Your Competition’ through and through.

But I must say in case you see this blog DLB- you do charge a shitload for a tee shirt!  Good on ya mate!

 

 

So what defines success?

I’ll tell you what doesn’t; Achieving your “goals”, making hundreds of dollars an hour, or even finding your purpose.

I’ve done all 3. And yet I still manage to make myself feel miserable every day because it’s “not enough”. I’ve spent my whole life trying to figure out what it “is” I’m supposed to be doing on this earth. Even with achieving 8 years of continual sobriety and 7.5 off of drugs- Even having a business where I don’t have to report to a superior; I AM the superior- Even being able to travel and not wake up to an alarm clock- Even having created a brand that is actually changing the world and is going to be bigger than Nike in 10 years time- SOMETHING is always not right.

Our clothing isn’t fashionable enough. The website has a problem. I want to be spending more time meditating. I want to meditate period. I want to have a more developed VMO (the teardrop muscle on the inside of your knee). I want to grow faster.

And on and on and on.

The ONLY thing I’ve found in life that makes me feel successful is when I’m in direct service to someone else who is in true need. I’m not talking about in need of an email answered. I’m talking about someone who needs to be heard because they feel alone and like life is not worth living. Someone who can’t stop drinking or doing drugs. Someone who has a teenage girl who is cutting themselves and they don’t know where to turn.
THAT kind of service.

The only challenge with that, is for me that’s difficult to measure.

So the other day I was doing something I hardly do anymore because when you devote every cell in your being to your enterprise- to your WHY, you can easily lose your libido.

While I was in the shower- I realized that even after 7 years, I’m more attracted to my husband than I was when we said our Do’s. I wasn’t thinking about someone else. Or needing to watch other people. I simply closed my eyes and thought about my husband and blew the roof off.

So what is the definition of success?

Is it a certain number hitting your bank account every day? And even then will that truly make you happy?  Will that change and is it ok for that number to change?  Or is success finding your voice and leaving a miserable relationship?  Is it coming out?  Or is it having a child?  Or do you just ‘think’ that’s what success is because society tells you that’s what we’re supposed to be doing as women?

My point is this; Everyone has a different deferent version of success. What’s important is that YOU figure out what that looks like to you. Not society. Not your parents. But YOU.
And by finding out that means DO SOME WORK!  Put pen to paper. Isolate yourself and do some writing. Ask yourself some important questions. Take time. Don’t rush it.

You deserve to connect with your innermost self and find out what that success looks like unattached by what everyone else around you ‘thinks’ it is. Too often we let our heads (thinking) define success and not our hearts (feeling) what success is.

Because I’ll tell you what: That O face sure FELT like success to me. And the O looked like my significant other.

Here’s to many more successful days grrrls!

Comment below what success looks like to you.

This blog might be the shortest read with the tallest reward you’ve had to boot- As a female entrepreneur, I will always endeavour to bring you tools that have changed my life for the better, and helped me find strength and power in relationships. Not power over someone else, but power over my own reactions and how I conduct myself. Society says that females are “weak and too soft for business”, but I call bullshit. We simply need to teach each other simple tools like the following. Enjoy!  And YES!  Share it!
MFCEO KO

Business Leadership: How to give someone bad news.

Do you have a parent that you need to break up with? Or a Boyfriend you need to kick to the curb? I mean, let down gently… Or how about an employee that needs to step up their game, but you’re not sure how to let them know in a constructive manner?

Grrrls- I present to you, the sandwich method.

The sandwich method was actually taught to me by one of my best life Teachers, my Husband. In fact, it was in the midst of him telling me that I needed to chill the fuck out, and stop stressing on everything because it was driving him nuts. Bless his heart-

Here’s how the conversation rolled:

(Positive)
“Honey- you are such a beautiful soul. You’re so caring and loving towards everyone and everything. I’m not sure you understand how much I admire you for that. I’ve never met someone with as much heart as you. It’s truly a gift.

(Negative)
However, sometimes our greatest gifts can cause us the most misery. You’re tendency to overthink and over stress details of things, and how others might perceive your intention, is having a bit of an effect on my own personal wellbeing. It’s bringing an extra layer of stress that I’m having a hard time coping with.

(Positive)
But I will say I’ll never meet another person on the face of this planet that I’d cope with as much extra shit for, than you. You’re my soulmate, and I would do anything for you. Not ‘damn near anything for you’, but anything for you. Because there is no one on this planet I admire, cherish and adore more than you.”

You see what he did there?

He started with a positive. He fed in the negative. Then he ended on a positive.

When you deliver information in this format, it allows the other person to take it onboard, and then end on a good note. As opposed to sitting someone down, and saying “Look Jane- you fucking suck. I appreciate you trying, but you’ve gotta do something different”… When you start out with a negative, the other party will shut down straight away. So start with a positive. Then slip in the part that needs addressing, fixing, or negative. Then end on a positive so they feel supported and encouraged to do something constructive, and not in a framework of feeling defensive.

I had a beautiful grrrlarmy member message me over IG and ask me how she could break up with a parent, as she remembered reading a blog months back on my personal brand’s website.

I suggested she could start with a letter first, or move into a convo.
I said something along the lines of:
“Start with the positive, put in the negative, end on the positive- so it sounds something like this: I love you because x, y, and z however I’m working on myself and need to surround myself with positive strong women. I feel disrespected with the way you’ve treated me lately. I will always love and appreciate everything you’ve sacrificed for me, and I hope you find happiness because you deserve it.”

Proof is in the love heart emoji. This shit works.

The reason why I wanted to write this, is this is the simple shit we aren’t taught in school. Come to think of it, effective communication is INCREDIBLY challenging, and yet the most rewarding tool to have in your tool belt. This is why I have insisted on doing a powerful, life-changing keynote on this topic at #GL18 April 28th in Las Vegas. The entire value of your ticket will be worth this one keynote alone, as I’m about to change your life and set you free. Buy your goddamn ticket here if you haven’t already! You deserve it!

“Photable”, The app that allows you to edit abs onto photos

I’m LIVID right now sisters.

This morning, I wanted to sit down and FINALLY attempt to spend a little time getting caught up on looking for #grrrlarmy posts, when three posts into IG, I get a sponsored post for an app that allows you to edit your photos. But not only is it a beauty filter, you can add ABS and definition into your pictures! (and I believe tattoos?)

As most of you know, I don’t have a snapchat because the filters drive me nuts. They pose to the younger generation as fun and harmless, when in fact they’re not whatsoever. They have an airbrushing effect so every photo looks flawless. Angelic-like even… Programming us to feel disgusted when we look in the mirror and see something other than what our photos exhibit.

Since I’ve been spending a ton of time in South East Asia, I’ve noticed that EVERYONE, men and boys included, use “beauty plus”. This app allows you to basically airbrush your photos in seconds.

I’ve had a few men reply “who cares?” when I recently posted my disgust.

Allow me to explain-

Most people go on social media with no awareness. Just harmlessly scrolling through posts. What happens is, we look at pictures of false realities, and our subconscious mind (the part of our brain that holds all of our beliefs… beliefs that rule our lives and behaviors) tell us that we are not good enough, because we don’t look that flawless. Furthermore, now with this app that allows you to falsify muscle and definition, aka hard fucking work and sacrifice, people who are trying to ‘get in shape’, will slide further down the hole of ‘not being good enough’ because everyone else is achieving results faster than them, and they cannot get their body to look like that no matter how hard they try.

So many women follow other “fitspo” models as motivation, and this is crippling to their self esteem and self worth. Yesterday, I even found MYSELF- someone I consider to be very “switched on” and “self aware”, feeling like I wasn’t doing enough because I didn’t look like this woman who “had her life together” with all her 750k followers, and a baby on the way, with her stunning, perfect photos. After about 20 seconds, I caught my thoughts on auto-pilot, and analyzed the insanity of them. Then realized I might as well be smoking crack, and how silly of me to think that these photos were real. Once again, everyone, anywhere, can make themselves flawless.

The scariest part of all of this, is that I’m 35 years old. There are girls as young as SEVEN years old with their own social media accounts. Furthermore, do you think that public education has been revolutionized in order to teach young people the reality of ‘social media’. I’m afraid not.
(Fear not… @GRRRL we have a plan and have been working on revolutionizing the public education system since 2013 so young people can be equipped with basic tools to lead a happy life and still use social media)

Now, it might be hard for a man to understand on a deep enough level (although there are plenty of men with eating disorders and body dissatisfaction), but women are fed ads over the course of our lifetime that convey a message reading in order to be beautiful, we must not have sun spots, lines, wrinkles, cellulite or dimples. Aka “flaws”. When they aren’t flaws at all. They are in part what makes us human.

It’s OK for men to be showing signs of aging in ads, but for women, it’s not acceptable.

Men are considered “distinguished” whereas women are considered “past her prime”.

Ads sell us an idea of success: What is beautiful and what is desirable. They are also completely unachievable, and not real.

SO- to take all of this false reality a step further and allow fake muscle, I believe we’ll start to see more men falling victim to the self-hatred parody, as well as women. Instead of using our thoughts to figure out how to better the world, we’ll be swirling around in a pool of self pity thinking that we aren’t good enough, nor will we ever be.

The fact that there are studies now being published that THREE YEAR OLDS ARE UNHAPPY WITH THEIR BODY, should be enough of a red flag and obvious point, to answer your question of “who cares”.

I encourage us all to refrain from using the beauty plus and facetune apps, and at the very least disclose when you do.

#grrrlarmy

I know I’m late to the party, as usual. But something needs to be said.
If you think Lady Gaga is fat, you’re a fucking idiot. Full stop-

Apologies to my Grandmother off the bat if you happen to read this. I’ve been doing really well when it comes to curbing my language. However, this topic needs SEVERAL f-bombs sprinkled throughout, so please stop reading if you can’t hang grams.
First off, I didn’t watch the superbowl because A) I’m not a die-hard fan of football and B) I think it’s pathetic that as a country, we have companies and corporations that spend millions of dollars on advertising and putting on a spectacle, when there are SO many homeless veterans (people who fought for your very freedom), women stuck in domestic violence situations, and so on.
Yes! For the love of God it’s “tradition”, and you want to “enjoy your life”, but there comes a time when some traditions need to be broken, and when you need to stop being a self-centred twat and stand up for those who don’t have the capacity to do so. Perhaps go to a junior varsity championship game, or go support your local fucking roller derby team.
Yes, I have my panties in a twist. Perhaps I wouldn’t if there was a female league of sport we could all support to this extent, but fear not, that’s coming.
I digress…..
As I was saying- I didn’t watch the superbowl, so I didn’t see Lady Gaga’s performance live. But what I did see upon awakening this morning, was a truckload of RIDICULOUS comments about her “muffin top”.
Here are a few things to keep in mind for the rest of this year:

1. ALL women have some kind of roll, somewhere. It’s called GRAVITY you moron. You don’t see it or know this to be true, because no woman wants to be NEAR you, let alone come home to your creepy ass apartment, or better yet, the basement of your mom’s house, so how could you know? But at some point in your adult life when you’re able to seduce a woman to take her clothes off around you, you’d realise that it’s human nature.

2. In my experience, women who do not have some amount of body fat on themselves, are 99% of the time, fucking MISERABLE. For a woman to be low enough in body fat to not have any ‘soft bits’, she’s dieting extremely hard, and working out like a fucking freak. I know because I’ve spent a majority of my life in that head space. And it sucks.

3. It’s 2000 and fucking 17- Grow the fuck up

4. Speaking of 2017, welcome to the party. In case you haven’t been introduced to the dawn of the new age, women aren’t here for your approval, and we truly do not give a fuck what you think. When you comment stupid shit like “I was waiting for a guest appearance but all I saw was Gaga’s muffin top”, you look like a SUCH an insecure little cock-sucker who has a 3 inch dick, and drives a ridiculously over-priced lifted F450.
Namaste Bitchesssssssss
KO,
MFCEO
#grrrlarmy

Good Day Grrrlfriends!

It’s your MFCEO Kortney “KO” Olson here.  Captain Thunder Thighs at your service.  Today I write to you from my new country Thailand.  I was meant to go watch #UFC196 with my partner at an Irish Pub this early afternoon, but decided to head back to the village (lol) so I could do some work.  This resulted in me ‘watching’ the game via text message with my Brother.

IMG_0537

After getting word that Holm got knocked out without tapping, I was caught between a slight moment of disappointment, and a slight moment of pride.  Then the thoughts started trailing in, hence why I’m here to share.

As a society, we are bred to put an immense amount of importance on being “winners”.  Think back to when either yourself, or your kids, were up for “field day races”.  Your excitement for “winning” that blue ribbon, or the excitement you felt when your kid(s) brought home a blue ribbon, filled you with pride and excitement.  Or how about your high school basketball team and the level of disappointment you felt when you lost the championship game.  Or as an adult, that feeling of “not winning” because you have a 1997 Toyota Corolla in the driveway of a house you pay rent on, with too many credit cards to pay back before purchasing something newer, more “winner-like”.

We are bred, especially as females, to see everyone else around us competition.  Inadvertently, we encourage kids from a young age to not work as a team, and to be concerned with satisfying the expectations of others, when it pertains to their lives.  I.e. our parents were more concerned about us winning, then we were.

Instead of getting rewarded for training our best, and actually showing up to have an experience, we get rewarded for “being the best”, as opposed to just being-  Keep in mind, we are human doings, not human beings……

Holly Holm is a goddamn champion.  She is the epitome of what a role model looks like.  She does not boast about herself, nor does she brag.  She simply just is-  She’s just a spirit having a human experience free from harsh judgement of herself and of others. (and yes, I’m sure there is some level of judgement- especially as a professional athlete.  you would not be human if you had zero judgement)

The GRRRL brand has been built off the foundation of this: We don’t do shit to fit in.  We don’t do shit to be better than other grrrls.  We support each other and feel connected.  She don’t place our worth on whether or not we are “winners” because we are already ALL born “winners”.

We are one.  We are #grrrlarmy !!!!

XOKO