I may be biased, but in my opinion, girls who lift weights are like an absolute gem in this world. And I’m sure most men would agree. Girls with muscle send out vibes of self-sufficiency, confidence, good health, and strong minds because lifting weight requires dedication and persistence making it a hard, yet admirable grind. So it’s not rocket science that guys would be attracted to it. I’m honestly flattered when people take time out of their day to approach me and talk to me about what it is I do to look the way I do. But let me tell you, it gets old quick when some of the same questions and statements are repeated over and over and over again by strangers who half the time are not listening and only interested in what that booty do, for lack of a better term. Ladies, I’m sure you’ve heard a few of these questions time and time again. Here is how I answer these questions vs. what I’m really thinking:
IF I HAD A DIME FOR EVERYTIME A GUY ASKED OR TOLD ME…
- “Do You Work Out?”
My response: Haha yeah you could say that.
What I’m Really Thinking: *insert sarcasm* No Bitch, actually, I look like this by doing absolutely nothing. No big deal man, genetics hooked me up… Obviously, I work out dude. And I already know that you knew that so pick something a little more creative to break the ice next time because I’m hearing this so much that I’m starting to think that it looks like I actually don’t work out.
- “How Much Do You Bench?”
My Response: I don’t know. I never bench.
What I’m Really Thinking: I am an Olympic Weightlifter, NOT a powerlifter. I literally just spent maybe six minutes of my time that I could’ve spent rolling out this knot in my quad at the gym before training explaining to you exactly what weightlifting was and the different lifts and how its nothing like powerlifting at all and how I never bench, and after all that, you’re STILL going to ask how much I bench? Like why? Why?
- “You Could Lift Me Over Your Head”
My Response: hah Probably.
What I’m Really Thinking: I could power snatch your ass for a triple fool.
- “You Could Squat Me”
My Response: For sure.
What I’m Really Thinking: I could squat four of you. For reps… and multiple sets.
- “Are a Lot of Guys Intimidated By You?”
My Response: I mean, I don’t know, maybe?
What I’m Really Thinking: I seriously don’t understand this question, like I never know how to respond. What do you mean? Intimidated to talk to me? Intimidated to look at me? Intimidated to ask me out? Are you asking this because I’m single? Are you asking this because I intimidate you? Are you asking this because you want to ask me out? How would I know if a guy was intimidated by me? If he was intimidated by me, that would mean he would never talk to me, and I would never know him, therefore I would never know he was intimidated by me. You see how that works? It doesn’t, and neither does this question, so don’t ask this question. Stupid question.
- “You Could Probably Kick My Ass”
My Response: Nah I’m a lover, not a fighter.
What I’m Really Thinking: How original. But seriously, why do guys say this? Like, it’s a little creepy. Do you want your ass kicked? Is this like a fetish thing for you? Or are you just trying to be funny? Because frankly, I think that’d be humiliating for you and such a turn off for me if I could actually kick your ass. But yes, I could definitely kick your ass. For sure. No doubt.
- “You Make Me Question My Manhood”
My Response: Sorry? My bad?
What I’m Really Thinking: I don’t know what you want me to say to this one fam. Whatever it takes to be more of a man, you do that. I myself am a woman, so I have no advice for you other than to stop being a little bitch.
- “I Repped (insert number of) Plates on the Leg Press the Other Day”
My Response: Oh wow, that’s dope.
What I’m Really Thinking: I don’t even know what you’re talking about. What does that even mean? Why did you walk all the way over here to tell me this? Chances are, you’re probably not doing it right, and in reality, you probably can’t squat for shit because your mobility is so poor and your legs and back are so weak from sitting down in weight machines all day. Man, I almost want to ask you to do an air squat now just to see that form.
- “How Do I Get Big?”
My Response: Not sure. Maybe high reps as heavy as you can go.
What I’m Really Thinking: OMG. Again, I literally just explained to you I am not a bodybuilder. I don’t know how to “get big”. I only know how to get strong with a lot of hard ass work. When you wanna mess with that, hit a girl up. And damn, do I really look that big today? Dooope.
…ID SERIOUSLY HAVE A LOT OF MONEY