I know I’m late to the party, as usual. But something needs to be said.
If you think Lady Gaga is fat, you’re a fucking idiot. Full stop-
Apologies to my Grandmother off the bat if you happen to read this. I’ve been doing really well when it comes to curbing my language. However, this topic needs SEVERAL f-bombs sprinkled throughout, so please stop reading if you can’t hang grams.
First off, I didn’t watch the superbowl because A) I’m not a die-hard fan of football and B) I think it’s pathetic that as a country, we have companies and corporations that spend millions of dollars on advertising and putting on a spectacle, when there are SO many homeless veterans (people who fought for your very freedom), women stuck in domestic violence situations, and so on.
Yes! For the love of God it’s “tradition”, and you want to “enjoy your life”, but there comes a time when some traditions need to be broken, and when you need to stop being a self-centred twat and stand up for those who don’t have the capacity to do so. Perhaps go to a junior varsity championship game, or go support your local fucking roller derby team.
Yes, I have my panties in a twist. Perhaps I wouldn’t if there was a female league of sport we could all support to this extent, but fear not, that’s coming.
As I was saying- I didn’t watch the superbowl, so I didn’t see Lady Gaga’s performance live. But what I did see upon awakening this morning, was a truckload of RIDICULOUS comments about her “muffin top”.
Here are a few things to keep in mind for the rest of this year:
1. ALL women have some kind of roll, somewhere. It’s called GRAVITY you moron. You don’t see it or know this to be true, because no woman wants to be NEAR you, let alone come home to your creepy ass apartment, or better yet, the basement of your mom’s house, so how could you know? But at some point in your adult life when you’re able to seduce a woman to take her clothes off around you, you’d realise that it’s human nature.
2. In my experience, women who do not have some amount of body fat on themselves, are 99% of the time, fucking MISERABLE. For a woman to be low enough in body fat to not have any ‘soft bits’, she’s dieting extremely hard, and working out like a fucking freak. I know because I’ve spent a majority of my life in that head space. And it sucks.
3. It’s 2000 and fucking 17- Grow the fuck up
4. Speaking of 2017, welcome to the party. In case you haven’t been introduced to the dawn of the new age, women aren’t here for your approval, and we truly do not give a fuck what you think. When you comment stupid shit like “I was waiting for a guest appearance but all I saw was Gaga’s muffin top”, you look like a SUCH an insecure little cock-sucker who has a 3 inch dick, and drives a ridiculously over-priced lifted F450.